I am not the person she was. If you knew me then you don't know who I am now. The things I did are not the things I do. I used to be cool with going out and drinking too much. I used to think smoking was cool. I thought I had to try to fit in and be the person everyone else was being. That is the funny thing about the drinking. It makes everyone essentially the same person. While you think it makes you look cool from the outside you realize just how completely ridiculous you looked. I was dumb before I knew who I was. It is funny because I still see that girl in the mirror. The one that is so unsure of herself, the one that thinks she has to try to make people like her. She is still here but she isn't me anymore. I made a choice. It is a choice that is definitely completely from the choices I made then. It is a choice that a lot of people I knew then and know now will definitely not agree with. I chose Jesus. If that sounds dumb to you the so be it. I no longer want to make people like me. I don't care if you agree with me or if you never want to speak to me again. I am not living for you. I am not even living for me anymore. This world is not where I belong. This world is not where I want to be. The best and most incredible thing about this one seemingly small choice is that I am happy. The things I tried to find in food, in my foul language, in the bottom of a bottle... I found them in Jesus.
Take that world!
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